The Siren's Song at Midnight -- Smash Comics #62 (DEC 1945)

Smash Comics #62 (DEC 1945)

Right off the bat, this splash page has me hooked.  For one thing, I think that Midnight's best villains have tended to be women.  Remember the air world and Queen Robustia?  How about the would be mob boss, Darla Dee?  Going waay back--and even though she wasn't really a villain--we might think of his encounter with the White Queen.  This Lorelei chick looks to be a similarly impressive femme fatale.  (Plus, I've always liked the name Lorelei!) Anyway...let's get back to this story, dear reader.

The story opens with Wackey and Sniffer at home, both independently swooning over pictures of a woman in the newspaper and proclaiming their undying love for this gal they've never met.  (Three guesses who this Cindy Crawford of 1945 might be.)  Meanwhile, Gabby is having a grand laugh at the histrionics of both men (but especially, of course, at Sniffer Snoop).

Mad with middle-age hormones, Sniffers charges out the door towards the Four Spades Club (where the Lorelei works as a dancer).  Wackey is hot on his heels, in order to "protect the Lorelei."  Gabby is trotting alongside, so as to ensure he doesn't miss any especially public humiliations of his pals.

At the club, Wackey and Sniffer's constant professions of undying love for the Lorelei ignite the murderous jealousy of fellow admirer, Gory Groggins.  While he's busy threatening to fit the two for cement shoes, Gabby remains unaffected by her wiley homo sapien charms.

When Midnight appears, Gabby mistakenly assumes there will now be at least one sane man up in the club.  No sooner does he show up, however, than even our paladin of justice seems entranced by the twirling figure of the Lorelei.

True, Midnight does momentarily snap out of his hormonal fog when the aforementioned Gory Goggins pulls a gun, threatening to kill Sniffer and Wackey if either of them take another step towards the Lorelei.  Big City's premier hero is moving in to seize Goggins' gat when the master of ceremonies takes center stage with the Lorelei at his side.  The emcee raises a hand for silence and proclaims, "a very important announcement."

As it turns out, his big announcement is that the Lorelei has consented to become his wife.  Naturally, this encites a murderous rage in the other men present who immediately charge the couple.  Midnight, despite initially appearing more perplexed (that the Lorelei would marry such a homely fellow) than bewitched, suddenly disappears.  We're left to surmise that he has joined in the parade of men vying for the voluptuous beauty's attention.

Gabby's left with no one but Hotfoot (which fact he is none too pleased about) when a gunshot rings out.  Gab fears the worst has finally happened:  someone's been killed over this crazy love dodecahedron.

A moment later, the lights in the club suddenly go out and a second gunshot resounds. When the lights come back, Gabby spies Sniffer holding his smoking firearm and standing over the dead body of the erstwhile emcee.

After a quick choking attack on Sniffer (I guess to demonstrate his bona fides) Wackey releases his rival to "comfort" the Lorelei.  For her part, she's mourning the burden of being so beautiful that men kill each other over her.

About this time, Gory Goggins comes charging in threatening to kill Wackey (and maybe even the Lorelei?) for "makin' time behind my back!"  Hot on Gory's heels, Midnight seems to have assumed Goggins was behind the gunshot.  After decking this issue's requisite mobster, he asks who killed "the squid."  (Wow, Midnight...that's kind of...insensitive.)  Despite Gabby's certainty that Sniffer's to blame, Midnight's not buyin' it.

In any event, Gabby notes that there were two shots.  Sniffer claims his was an accidental fire that hit the light (i.e., the first shot).  Next, Gab asks Doc if he was the one who bumped off the competition.  (Geez, Gabby--way to assume the worst of your buddies!)

While admitting that he wouldn't necessarily be above killing, "for love" Doc insists that he couldn't be responsible because he had no gun.

(Here we have a brief "action discursus" where Goggins revives and tries to plant a pistol on Wackey.  Midnight catches him and again knocks the macguffin mobster out cold--or so we're led to believe).

Despite being 0-2 at this point does nothing to blunt Gabby's instinct to speculate on who the killer might be.  He notes that if Sniffer lacked the aim to hit the broadside of a barn, and Wackey was sans the means to kill anybody, then that "just leaves Gory and the Lorelei" (I admit, I'm not seeing how that follows when there was apparently a nightclub full of guys there at the old Three Spades...but whatever!)

He concludes the Lorelei couldn't have done it 'cause her...umm...wardrobe...lacked any where to...uh...hide the weapon.  Gab even sorta' kinda' asks Midnight if he might've danced a bit too close to the flame.  Our boy in blue retorts--not at all suspiciously--that, "I was too busy...looking for something!"  (Oh!  Okay.  I guess that settles that.)

When all is said and done, Gab comes to the conclusion that since all the other suspects have been eliminated, Gory must be the killer.  Unfortunately for the cause of justice, however, ol' Groggins seems to have an iron jaw. When they turn to seize his (presumptively unconscious frame) they find that Gory has roused himself and fled! Midnight pursues him to the rooftop where Gory takes two shots at Midnight.

I'm not following this math.  Gory took one shot that killed the emcee. 
Two more at Midnight during the pursuit.  That's only three shots
How is our hero so certain Gory's out of bullets? 

When Gory peaks his head through the window (I guess to gloat over Midnight's corpse) our boy slams the window frame on his head, and then tosses in an extra slug to the face for good measure.  Amazingly, not even this knocks the concrete-skulled bad guy out.

Hauling him back downstairs, Midnight notices Gory has three guns--one more than he's ever been known to carry.  Gory asks what difference that makes.  He killed "the squid," because he was gonna marry the Lorelei and that's that.

When they meet up with the others, Gabby says it's too bad the Lorelei isn't here to see the mystery cleared up.  Midnight asks where she's gone and finds out that the vixen, "went home to rest up."  Our boy leaves Groggins in the hands of his buddies and takes off after the Lorelei. And then comes our final page "big reveal."